Oliver's new most favorite and most used words "no" and "I do it" Quite sure that this is also proof he is developing properly, as most two year olds seem to be preaching some version of the same.
Here's how it goes down at out place...
Me: Good morning Oliver, I love you
Him: No
Me: Time to sit on the potty
Him: No
Me: Oatmeal or eggs for breakfast?
Him: No (with an added foot stomp for extra emphasis)
-foot stomping is strictly forbidden and results in an immediate time out and a mandatory apology...just seem so disrespectful to me and I've seen what behaviors like the morph into once the child is in kindergarten, not good.
Me: Oliver, when I tell you to do something you say "yes, mama"
Him: Yes, mama
Me: Time to sit down and eat some lunch
Him: No
The rules Jim and I now follow
1. Limit the number of no's that comes from our mouths. Instead of "no trowing food" we say "Oliver please stop throwing your food"
2. Everything should be stated and not asked
Me: Trying to vacuum the floor
Him: I do it
Me: Gladly
Me: Trying to scoop out cooking batter
Him: I do it
Me: Sorry buddy people don't want toddler funk in their cookies
Him: I DO IT!
How do you combat the NO and I DO IT at your place? Or, if you are so lucky, how did you bypass it?
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On a more cheery note, I have managed to get Oliver to say "thanks mama" after I give him something. "Thanks mama" is what gets me though all the NO and foot stomping.
Here's how it goes down at out place...
Me: Good morning Oliver, I love you
Him: No
Me: Time to sit on the potty
Him: No
Me: Oatmeal or eggs for breakfast?
Him: No (with an added foot stomp for extra emphasis)
-foot stomping is strictly forbidden and results in an immediate time out and a mandatory apology...just seem so disrespectful to me and I've seen what behaviors like the morph into once the child is in kindergarten, not good.
Me: Oliver, when I tell you to do something you say "yes, mama"
Him: Yes, mama
Me: Time to sit down and eat some lunch
Him: No
The rules Jim and I now follow
1. Limit the number of no's that comes from our mouths. Instead of "no trowing food" we say "Oliver please stop throwing your food"
2. Everything should be stated and not asked
Me: Trying to vacuum the floor
Him: I do it
Me: Gladly
Me: Trying to scoop out cooking batter
Him: I do it
Me: Sorry buddy people don't want toddler funk in their cookies
Him: I DO IT!
How do you combat the NO and I DO IT at your place? Or, if you are so lucky, how did you bypass it?
-----
On a more cheery note, I have managed to get Oliver to say "thanks mama" after I give him something. "Thanks mama" is what gets me though all the NO and foot stomping.
I hate to say it, but it doesn't stop at 2. :) Cole does a more sophisticated version at 4, but we tell him that that is too bad if he doesn't want to do something, we asked. We say, "Who's in charge? Cole, or Mommy & Daddy?" He of course says "Mommy and Daddy" and we reiterate that he needs to listen to us.
ReplyDeleteAlso, when Oliver gets a little older, you can do the 1-2-3 magic thing. So you say something like, "Oliver, please clean up these books." He says, "no," and you just say, "That's 1. Please clean up your books." If he says no again, you say, "that's 2. Please clean up your books." When/if it gets to 3, he gets a time-out. When it's all done, you start again. Usually by that point they get that you mean business, although there is the occasion where multiple time-outs are needed to get the job done. :) Over time, they are in theory supposed to do whatever you ask without as much counting. Sometimes this works, sometimes it doesn't. The key is in keeping it simple with the counting and not getting too worked up (that part is difficult for me!).
I like the stating, not questioning. So annoying when I hear "please stop throwing your food, ok?" or "can you pick up your toys now?". I mean, this is a dictatorship. We dont have to be rude, but some authority should be utilized. I can't stand when I hear myself saying no every three secondsthen asking a kid if he would like to behave or not. Sheesh. Stick to your rules, they are good ones. And I also am a fan of 1-2-3 then a calm and direct time out for repeat offenders.
ReplyDelete